Im a human Christmas Card again

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gig

This Holiday season I’ll be your Human Christmas card performing for you on short clips the Christmas song of your choice.

this year I have a better camera and a new Ninja mask, so I think it will be fun for everyone.  Here is the Link to my fiverr gig.

This Holiday I’ll be your Human Christmas card performing for you on short clips the Christmas song of your choice.

ALSO All year long I’ll put my music skills at your service, with short clips making salutations and performing at your request. All my music skills at your service on video performance and audio recordings for you, from Background Music or intros for your youtube videos, collaborations with other instruments to the track you have made, to tracks for your raps, Traps or Reguetons. Or simply a Drum or percussion Track for your music.

So I Do:

  • Video performance
  • Audio Recordings, original music composition.
  • Drum Tracks for your music
  • Write lyrics in English and Spanish

CONDITIONS OR LIMITATIONS FOR BOTH VIDEOS AND AUDIO RECORDINGS:

At the moment I only have:

  •      Guitars (electric and acoustic nylon strings)
  •      Cuatro (it’s a sort of Venezuelan ukulele)
  •      Harmonica
  •      Digital percussion tools

I am versatile with these elements so I can create tracks of different genres.

As you can see this gig is here to stay, somehow I figured out the way to put all my music skills in a single gig.

Go to my gig on fiverr

 

 

 

Gavilander on Fiverr ?

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It’s been a long time since the last time I posted here and well what can I say, I’m still living in Venezuela and that fact implies a considerable amount drama but nothing strong enough to stop me from bringing a quality service to all my clients or buyers on fiverr.

Anyway I came here to talk about me and my Fiverr gigs. As you already may know, fiverr only allow me to have only 7 gigs and that is a little frustrating because I feel like I still have so many more useful skills to serve people far beyond the skills or gigs that I’m displaying right now.

 

ENGINEER:

I have a degree on Agricultural engineering, and not I’m not a plants doctor at all, I am more like a civil engineer oriented to Agricultural / hydraulics works or waterworks. I know what you may think of these Colleges or Universities from third world countries but my College or University was the number 50th of the world in 2017 according to the Times Higher education ranking of that year, that have to mean something , right? 😅.

 

PROGRAMMER ?:

I feel weird calling myself a programmer right now, but my growth in this last years have been considerable and soon I think I could bring some new services to the world. My programming skills right now goes from Javascript Calculators of different kind, VBA, to the advanced excel stuff that is complex enough to be considered as a programming task worthy of a question on stack over flow.

 

ARTS AND MUSIC:

Currently I’m just making graphic art stuff from pencil sketches to stickers png vectorized custom illustrations, I could make logos but that is like a cliché on fiverr I don’t know. About the music I had a gig in the pass where I play Christmas songs with my guitar or harmonica on video wearing a creepy mask, and of course that didn’t go well but I have to say I opened the gig 2 days before Christmas Eve, I mean it didn’t have too much promotion I have to say that. Heres is a sample of the promotion for that creepy chrismas gig, Right now I don’t have any musical gig right now or musical fiverr gig where I can display my musical abilities in other ways as music producer or beat maker maybe in the future.

 

OK finally here are my fiverr gigs so far, I will put in red the ones with no sales which are the ones that are about to disappear, also the Titles has a link to each gig on fiverr :

Black and white Pencil sketches and digital graphic art custom illustrations:

The title say it, I know the gig is quite messy but basically it’s pencil caricatures or portrait sketches and digital illustrations on png, it could be both things, once you are happy with the sketch I could vectorize it or just traditional old school pet logos, avatar for your gamming profile etc.

 

Customized Excel spreadsheet:

So far I’ve made Inventories and sell management sheets all in one, a spreadsheet that tells you how much you should gamble (Kelly criteria), basic sales management sheets, a spreadsheet that calculates the power of your electric generator and that’s all I can remember.

First I understand the science and theory behind the task if I don’t know it already and then I design the best way to put it inside an excel spreadsheet.

 

I will make IDF curves with your climate data:

No luck with this one, Intensitie duration and frequency curves with your climate data.

I will make Level curves maps:

Level curves maps or Altimetry plans with the CSV /  EXCEL data of your device (Total station, differential GPS, etc) I just need the X, Y, Z coordinates to generate your digital plan in .dwg or .dxf. No luck with this one either I wonder if it is not a commercial thing because the people who operates also knows how to make the plans in a professional environment not like in an academic environment where some students didn’t knew, I have some other theories about the failure of this gig but life goes on and I will have erase some gigs to create others more productive.

 

Transcription Of Spanish audios:

As you may have notice my English is not the best, despite I wrote this without google translator and maybe a little help from grammarly, I don’t feel with enough confidence in my English to work with English audios right now but I’ll be ready eventually, I mean there are to many accents out there, I have problems understanding some Australians on TV or youtube, not the actors like the Hemsworth or Margo but the regular people, also some Scottish or Scotch by example Sir Alex Ferguson sometimes it’s hard for me to understand him, Whatever, only Spanish audios by now, I think you got the point.

 

Transcription of text from Pictures, PDF, manuscripts to docx or the text file format of your choice:

The Language here is Irrelevant; this is more about known characters so I would say all languages except Asians languages (mandarin, Japanese, Korean), Arabs, Hindi / Urdu and Slav languages either. It’s not discrimination it’s just a thing of different alphabets which I don’t have the keyboard nor the knowledge to make a transcription.

 

Data Entry, data collection:

Not too much to say about this one, I collect data from the internet, it covers too many areas, you can ask me by message only on fiverr please.

Finally I know an engineer making some works that in other realities or countries are inconceivable if you have an ego and an idea of what an engineer should be, but I live in a different Country with a different reality where I have to put all my monetize all my skills in order to have a basic, decent life style.

This has been my Longest post so far in my history as a blogger, thanks for reading this I don’t think that I deserve that. Anyway I feel like I still have to clarify some things like my masked phase but that will be in another post, please don’t let that detail stop you from getting an exceptional fiverr experience with me (100% five stars reviews so far).

 

 

Planialtimetric map drawing on fiverr

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Go to the Fiverr Gig

Here I am after the epic failure of my Christmas gig promoting not a new gig or exposing another bad Idea that I had a while time ago. Lets just jump into it:

I will make a Level curves map or  Altimetric Situation plan with the data of your device. The required data:

  • Coordinates X Y (North-east coordinates, latitud and longitude)
  • the height of each point (Z)

No matter what device you use, those are the requirements to make it. Preferably in excel format if your device allows you to do it.

The file format of the delivered plan will be .dxf .dwg or .top

Whatever I’ve reached a point where I have to put all my skills to work for me and make some money and fiverr only allows 7 gigs for user so I have to start erasing some gigs with no orders and this is one of those gigs that Im not so sure about them, and I have to stick to the numbers= 0 orders, 0 questions a few impressions and clics.

I was asking some engineers on reddit (the freaking quora takes a lifetime to get answers unless you ask about video games or other shit) whatever I ask them if this was a commercial skill for a freelancer because I think everyone who makes their topographic survey also Knows how to process, plot or draft the maps or altimetric plans. So why would they leave that task in the hands of a stranger I don’t know. What do you think? or maybe fiverr is not the place for that I don’t know.

My english is not the best but remember that I was formed as an engineer in my native language and I try to translate some technical terms and still at this era It’s quite hard to find tha accurate translation so I hope you can understand. However I keep working on my english so let me know what do you think about this topic or leave some corrections on the comments below.

 

Gavilander performs Chistmas songs for $5 (with or without the mask)

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Ladies and gentlemen this Christmas you can give your loved ones a personalized greeting followed by the Christmas song of your choice played by the same Gavilander with his Harmonica or guitar, not both but if you pay enough you can even arrange a sung version if you wish . There are only a few days left but I am ready to act and quickly edit that video for you in the best way possible is funny but it is very likely that the final result will be better than what you see in that video which I made in a very hasty way and maybe ended up playing against it. –go to my fiverr gig->

There is No trick it’s $ 5 for an instrumental video interpretation of your favorite Christmas song plus the personalized greeting you ask before starting my performance.

As for the mask I can use it or not depending on what you prefer, I know what you are going to say (- please wear the mask bro). Actually I use it to diminish the collateral damage that could cause me since I am developing a considerable marketing campaign because in fìverr I am only an Engineer for my clients and my artistic side is quite reduced, in short Im talking about the collateral damage in my professional and personal life beyond fiverr.

Without further ado here it’s the gig description:

I will make a video with your Custom Christmas Greeting, performing the Christmas song of your choice with my Harmonica or my guitar.

  • A few words at the beginning expressing the Christmas greeting that you want me to say. (or not the price it’s the same anyway)
  • You have to choose one Instrument: Harmonica or Guitar, It can’t be both because I don’t have a holder for my harmonica.
  • My performance it’s completely free I may change the key of the song to fit the key or range of my Harmonica.
  • The length of the video won’t be longer than 60 seconds, this is more like a Human Christmas card and not a full song performance.
  • I can show my face if you want to, it’s the same of my profile but without photoshop #LOL (or not the price it’s the same anyway).

As always you can Contact me if you have any Doubt… Happy Holidays

I would have no problem joining the so-called “jesters of fiverr” like the “funny guys”, “fiverr Jesus” and maybe Voiceover Pete but not really Pete is an announcer and that’s a real talent, in fact he’s the most talented of that “Category” even more than Big Man Tirone (I said more talented no more funny). I would have no complains if I’ld get to generate the same profits as they doing something that I love doing like music, the problem lies in the chances of failure in a saturated market of people who surely do not need it as much as I do, a buffoon with props or a musician?.

The need of a Venezuelan who still lives in Venezuela where I live as you may have heard on the news or worse, things are not for those who need them most are for those who want it most, All I know is that I can not stay arms crossed while my account is at zero inside all this immense nightmare.

Wow it gets real dark at the end sorry about that, there is 4 days left but I already feel the like the gig has failed.

Go to my fiverr gig

Hot vs. Cute: The HC Balance

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Drawings, illustrations, caricatures those things that I hang on my instagram and that I know I’m not the best at doing them, I guess it’s like I always say with my music “- It’s not what I do for music, it’s what music does for My guess is that it happens the same way with my drawings especially when I draw Girls, and if I already know what many should be thinking, that’s why I only try to draw celebrities or famous people in general, although recently I broke that rule, one single Once drawing an unknown is not wrong.

The HC Balance:

This is a post a bit identified with the shape and superficial  in part, let’s talk about the balance HC or as you all can seen in the figure is a quantitative representation and in percentages of the Hot (sexy, sexually attractive) or the Cute (cute, adorable but like when you see a puppy of your favorite animal), the cute almost always comes from the face but can come from a set of traits, qualities or attitudes, of course the readings of that balance are subjective, Someone that I consider closer to the other Cute side can see more towards the Hot and so on. Well when I take the time to draw a girl it is because I think that her HC balance leans more to the cute side, that is, it is quite an experience to sit down to contemplate those images or to hold them mentally from my memories, I feel that rejoicing very similar to that peace that lays in the present (mindfulness), to draw them is like an “excuse” to stop to contemplate them, that’s why the trip is more than the destiny; I do not understand how I feel something so sublime from something so superficial, surely there is the name of a disease, disorder or pathology for that type of behavior.

I made these sort of definitions of concepts that you already know in Europe and USA but in South America at least my generation I don’t know how to explain it but we don’t have a word for Cute I mean some people use the word “Linda” in spanish which is the closest equivalent or translation but some people just think that “linda” is somehow beneath Gorgeous and beautiful all in one scale

In my instagram you can see the failed attempts less distant from the starting point because although it is true that what I do are caricatures, there is a limit to everything especially in that network where talented people expose their work. As for the celebrities that I have tried to draw, I don’t feel very sure mentioning them, I would not like people judging as “- Do You really think that this thing looks like Cara Delevingne?” And comments of that style, but I have improved with time, Maybe the next I dare to mention them, although there was a girl who reacted to a caricature I made of her, Camille is a blogger basically she said that she liked the drawing, but she did not follow me back 😭

Real life girls:

I used to call non-celebrity mortals, and the truth it seems quite stupid I do not know why do I wrote it, from time to time I find in my environment a girl that I would like to draw, I do not know if I explained it well but there are attractive girls or women in different places but finding one with the indicated HC balance is not seen every day, in order, it is difficult to ask for authorization if you do not know it previously because if you open a first verbal contact expressing your need or your intention to draw it asking permission you will find some resistance already Who thinks that you are doing the court and maybe it could work once but then to the second time you are the one of the “pick up line” of the cartoonist . The thing is that in my university I didn’t want to make bigger the trail of eccentric acts that I already had being an autistic who stayed too long in that place, I already had a rule of not even trying to draw girls from there.

I Broke my own rule:

Maybe if you could see her in person you would understand why I broke it (my rule) the thing is that I was about to finish subjects (or however you call it when you finish all your classes) and I was very exposed to this girl, my last semester was a 3 subjects one all in a day and in 2 of them I have to see her. What could I say about her, I like the color of her eyes to super simplify her, her hair  her choices in clothes, from those vans she uses and her general style from head to toe, you do not know if she is following a new trend or is creating it.

The only time we crossed word was because she had to play Chess against me in a kind of tournament that the teacher improvised and I did not expect it,  while looking at her pieces on the board and my eyes stared by accident on her blouse for few seconds  (- not adjusted, no cleavage, no transparency, I was lost more in the colors of his clothes), I  was lost for a moment I do not know how many seconds they were, I reacted when I saw her covering her chest trying to close her sweater as if I were looking at her breasts, but damn it if they are minimal!, damn it, my reaction was to take my hand to my eyes 😳, my plan before that error was, not look her in the eye and win the game that in case you are asked I won it When I look into her eyes it was like when you look at an incandescent light and then you close your eyes you only see a glow of color in the dark or an effect more like radiation. The thing is that with all that added to my rule that I didn’t want to break, the conditions were not there to speak to her, maybe I had to cut with sticks and chips  For goods and all and talk to her  but it would have been more awkward  and she wouldn’t have believed me, I guess that drawing her is as a claim more to myself as saying “-you are fucking cute girl” I do not expect anything just wanted to say it “-you are fucking cute girl, sorry if I bothered you with my voluntary and involuntary visual contacts” but do not worry I will not tag her, I do not follow her in any social networks, in the end they are only superficial things that surely she has to listen to frequently.

Finally all women forgive me if you found the “Balance HC”a little offensive but I don’t think I invented it, I suppose I heard it somewhere and I don’t remember the source, the thing is that they are two forms of attraction, the factor Hot tends to perish faster in time or in our perceptions and the Cute factor can be eternal if you want or maybe not so much but if it prevails more in time and perceptions than its counterpart.

I could make a huge list of excuses trying to explain why I never talked to her before of after but that would be something like “- bla bla bla  Im a pussy”. At the beginning I wasn’t so interested on her it was like an infectious virus or something, but Anyway what do you think Was I a pussy or not? Let me know in the comments below.

This is the drawing that broke my own rule

 

Who the hell is gavilander?

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gavilander

Gavilander as a word comes from the mix of two nicknames –> gavilan + vander = gavilander, two towns one nick name per town so I wanted to mix or blend both in one word, I think that it sounds good, a bit longer I must say (11 letters) but it doesn’t feel like an 11 letters word at least not pronouncing it in Spanish, I wonder how would it sound in English or how would they pronounce it, they don’t call by that name (gavilander), they call me Vander, Van, Gavs or by my real name I don’t care and Im missing the point here.

Initially Gavilander it supposed to be the name of a band, I know its quite egocentric to call a rock band with the Nickname of one member but let face it is an awesome name, but I never get to the point where I or we were ready as band itself , However the band thing didn’t happen but I keep doing music on my own so I keep the name for myself as a musician an then for my others activities as freelancer.

The bird that you see in my logo is hack or a sparrow hack in Spanish “gavilan” that’s why you see it on the logo and in this case you see the UK flag on it but that just because Im starting to write in English I got another blog on blogger gavilander.blogspot.com but this is better ranked on google I guess that google doesn’t want to benefit blogger because they own it and they don’t place it on the top of the search results, I can’t find another reason I mean it has less content, less text but is better ranked than my other blog.

I think about  just take the content of my other blog in Spanish and paste it in this one but then I have a terrible idea to make this blog in English to work out, train or increase my English level or my skills with this language, as you can see I have a lot of work to do, but I need to specially now that Im trying to start as a freelancer on fiverr and Im communicating with my clients in English. About the Blog sometimes is going to be translation of the post of my Spanish blog but the most of the time I want to bring exclusive content to my English audience.

About me as a person and the content of my future posts I’ll be following the line of the description of the blog itself “Young adult on the precipice of defeat, trying to survive in country which is going through an humanitarian crisis (Venezuela), dealing with anxiety, and some other ASD in the process” I’ll try to talk about the things that I like, my struggle while Im trying to survive in Venezuela or get away from there, a little bit of  self promotion (music, fiverr gigs, probably patreon) but just a little, and as the majority of blogs the things that I don’t like that much.

To get in in the context  of  the Venezuelan Crisis you can watch this awesome video from John Oliver.

And that’s it from me with my first blog post in English disastrous as I expected.

Camara digital con bateria de Telefono Celular

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INGREDIENTES:

– Cámara Digital (que opere con baterías o pilas AA)
– Batería de 3.7 V (De 1 teléfono Celular viejo y en desuso)
– Cargador de 3.7 V 
– Cables (puedes cortar de algun cargador que ya no utilices no hay porque gastar dinero)
– Conectores para los cables (Opcional igual funciona con empalmes)
– Cautín y estaño
– Amor (porque nada funciona sín amor)
 
 

PREPARACIÓN:

Comenzamos con la batería del celu viejo yo utilizo una de un motorola grueso de esos CDMA de 3.7 V , Toma la Batería y 2 cablecitos que vas a cortar como de 5 a 7 cm los vas a soldar con estaño a los polos positivo y negativo respectivamente. Esta bateria con la extensión adecuada te puede servir de “bloque de poder (power block)” para tu teléfono actual cuando no halla un toma-corriente cerca o se vaya la electricidad en tu casa u oficina. Puedes colocar conectores los machos en los extremos de los cables que soldaste a la batería y los hembras en los extremos que vas a soldar en los receptores de la cámara.
 

La Cámara:

 
Esto es más complicado, tienes que abrir tu camara y localizar las placas que reciben a las Pilas AA, y las placas no los contactos de la tapa ni los resortes pues esos resortes o laminas hacen de intermediario y contactan con la placas al cerrar la tapa con las pilas AA y al no haber estas no habrá presión ni contacto por lo que debes ir debajo de estas laminitas que hacen de resortes y soldar allí tus cables en los contactos positivo y negativo respectivamente. Si vas a utilizar conectores colocar los conectores hembra en los extremos que salen a la superficie los cuales vas a conectar a tu batería en secuencia inversa el Negativo con el positivo y el positivo con el negativo (o así funciona con mi cámara).
 
Para cargar la Batería que has habilitado solo usa un cargador y empalma (o usa conectores) a los extremos de la la Batería para recargar durante 2 hrs, recuerda no excederse pues en este sistema de carga no hay indicador de llenado y si te pasas fundes la batería o reduces su vida útil. 
 
Como ven la mía funciona con empalmes pues vivo en Venezuela 2017 y de vaina consigues comida, todo esto lo hice con cosas que tenia en mi casa, la cámara estaba en desuso pues no compraba baterías AA por los motivos antes mencionados además de que contaminan y se gasta rápidamente y las recargables de este tipo son muy costosas al menos para mi, que a pesar de mis habilidades diversas sigo desempleado. Ah claro y no estamos renunciando a las pilas AA pues es un sistema dual las pilas van a quedar algo apretadas pero funcionará seguro.
 

En cuanto al Power Brick/Block

 
Con la misma batería le agregas una extensión que tenga el plug según tu tipo de teléfono, de un cable viejo o no se si en tu país tal vez la encuentres en una tienda de electrónica, le adhieres a través de conectores esa extensión a los cables de tu batería o bien empalmando pero eso tiene sus inconvenientes además de que si lo haces con cables de distinto espesor probablemente no funcione. Por ultimo recuerda que si vas a usar un cable USB viejo de los que tienen 4 cablecitos adentro solo debes usar los 2 de energía el positivo y negativo y Obviar los 2 de datos, los podras identificar por su color, google te lo dice yo no lo recuerdo.       
  

Detesto las fotos frente a un espejo pero es el único modo de probar que una cámara funciona.